No oneelse ever really mattered to her. Even after all the time we'd beentogether, I doubted that she really knew that much about me. Who Iwas or what I could do had never overly interested her much.And he - my once best friend - wasn't all that much better than shewas. He had always wanted what other people had without having toearn it himself. But he still had his flaws. Somehow he'd neverrealized that those people who could see which of his strings to pullhad never had trouble manipulating him.Putting it plain and simple, she was user. On the other hand, shewould have loudly disagreed with that assessment of her character.Quite apparently, she had wanted a new boy toy because she had simplygrown tired of me. And the poor simpleton was readily - far tooreadily - available.Of course, he was also a user. As with her, I have no doubts he wouldhave vehemently disagreed with that assessment. He wanted her simplybecause he didn't have her. He had obviously never heard that ageold saying. At this point I hated my male genitals, a lousy reminder of what mygender used to be.In therapy, Deborah was helping me explore my feminine side as a youngwoman with a career ahead of me. She also began to help me think about myrights and how they were violated when those men had kicked me out of mydorm. In truth I had never really dealt with the emotional abuse Ireceived at the hands of those assholes. I also began to think seriouslyabout having gender reassignment surgery, but had no way to pay for it.My Ben was in love with me, at least he was as Beth. But he was gettingtired of me telling him that my virginity was being saved for marriageand that he could not touch me down there. I could tell he was gettingfrustrated, and our relationship had plateaued and now it was dangerouslyclose to slowing down and falling off of a steep cliff. How long is myBen going to wait for me? I was running out of ways to be creative withhim in the sack and keeps his hands off my clit. I really liked.
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